Your children love you. They are born loving their parents. It’s part of who they are as children. And it’s absolutely essential to love them back. They can’t help loving you and if you restrain yourself from loving them, if you don’t act loving and nurturing, there’s little else you can do to make up for it. This isn’t just a Mormon principle—researchers agree. Children love and if it isn’t reciprocal, they will be very, very unhappy. Mormons believe that children need love very much.

But of course you love your children—how do you show it? You’ll find that what makes your children feel loved may be different from how you feel loved, or how your other children feel loved. You need to know your children and be aware of who they are. There are a number of ways to find out how they feel appreciated and loved.

Read more at our site’s new article about Loving Your Children.

In the Mormon Church it is stressed that children are better taught by precept and example. This point is also confirmed by research. When parents’ words and actions are in harmony they have a greater positive effect on children.

The Lord has said:

” ‘Inasmuch as parents have children in Zion, or in any of her stakes which are organized, that teach them not to understand the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ the Son of the living God, and of baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of the hands, when eight years old, the sin be upon the heads of the parents. . . .

” ‘And they shall also teach their children to pray, and to walk uprightly before the Lord’ (D&C 68:25, 28).

According to Elder Hales, “Children who are taught to pray and who pray with their parents when young are more likely to pray when they are older. Those who are taught when they are young to love God and believe He lives will more often continue their spiritual development and increase their feelings of love as they mature.” (Robert D. Hales, “How Will Our Children Remember Us?” Ensign, Nov. 1993, 9-10)

Marriage is very important for most people, but this should be even more important for members of the Mormon Church since they believe in eternal marriage.

There are certain myths that are prevalent among people in our society and even in the Church that can mislead our decisions.
This interesting list of myths about preparing for marriage is found in Jeffry Larson’s book, “Should we stay together”.

Myth #1: There is only one right person in the world for you to marry.
Reality: There are several individuals to whom you could be happily married.

Myth #2: Until a person finds the perfect person to marry, he or she should not be satisfied.
Reality: No one is perfect.

Myth #3: You should feel totally competent as a future spouse before you decide to get married.
Reality: A person should feel competent to be a spouse, though some feelings of anxiety are natural.

Myth #4: You should be happy with anyone you choose to marry if you try hard enough.
Reality: It takes two mature and well-adjusted individuals to make a marriage work, so one needs to be reasonably sensitive and selective in the choice of a mate.

Myth #5: You should choose someone to marry whose personal characteristics are opposite from your own.
Reality: A person should choose someone to marry whose personal characteristics are similar to his or her own.

Myth #6: Being in love with someone is sufficient reason to marry that person.
Reality: Although romantic love is important, especially in the early stage of a relationship, other factors are equally or more important to marital satisfaction and should be considered before marriage.

Myth #7: Choosing someone to marry is a “decision of the heart.”
Reality: Choosing someone to marry is decision of the heart and the head.

Myth #8: Living together will prepare you for marriage and improve your chances of being happily married.
Reality: Cohabitation may help us get to know each other better, but will not serve as a trial marriage or increase our chances of being happily married.

Myth #9: Choosing a mate should be easy.
Reality: Choosing a mate is not easy; the decision should be carefully thought out.

Myth #10: Preparing for marriage “just comes naturally.”
Reality: Preparing for marriage is learned and is based on sound information and personal assessment.

These myths and interpretations can be found in Jeffry Larson’s book, “Should we stay together”. Larson, J. H. (2000). San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass (pp. 3-12).

Shared religious beliefs and practices within marriage help couples prevent, resolve and reconcile marital conflict, according to a new study out of Brigham Young University. Dollahite interviewed 57 highly religious, middle-aged married couples from “Abrahamic” or major monotheistic faiths comprising Christianity, Judaism and Islam. Participating couples from New England and California were asked several questions regarding the influence and impact of religion on their marriage. (Read More)

The Mormon Church focuses its attention of families because one of the basic Mormon beliefs is about the eternity of families. When people realize that their family relationships are supposed to last for all eternity they start thinking and behaving differently.

Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of the Mormon Church said:

“We cannot and we must not allow the school, community, television, or even Church organizations to establish our children’s values. The Lord has placed this duty with mothers and fathers. It is one from which we cannot escape and one that cannot be delegated. Others may help, but parents remain accountable. Therefore, we must guard the sanctity of our homes, because that is where children develop their values, attitudes, and habits for everyday living.” ( M. Russell Ballard, “Teach the Children,” Ensign, May 1991, 79-80)

I have noticed how easy it is for our kids, especially teenagers, to be influenced by their peers. Even when parents are teaching the correct principles they still are tempted to follow the crowd of their friends without always thinking properly about consequences.

Fathers and mothers have the duty of teaching their children and they can’t delegate this duty to anybody else. However, fathers and mothers are more motivated and inspired to teach their children when they have an eternal perspective, when they know the real purpose of what they are doing.

This is one of the reasons because if we desire to live in a better world we should be promoting missionary work. Probably more good people will improve their parenting by learning about the Gospel of Jesus Christ than by participating in most parenting seminaries.